TwentyeLevent

its a long road I need ta pass on.....

exchange year....
i never prepare for it...

as I came back from my nest. I felt like I been renewed I never had a feeling such scared to move on like before maybe I'm getting mature

after 2 days been in hostel I heard rumors from my house mate that this sem 4 my college will send some of student go to Indonesia for practical.

I been missed to apply it on that day because I thought they just playing each other. After arriving from class I heard it again then I start asking them is it "true" or "not"
hmmm.... yes that it. Quickly I told my friend I also want to go... then she asked the person who incharge of this. Luckly there is still 4 left empty. I gave my full name, ID card number, matrix number and my number phone as they ask me to do so,

I really don't understand........ WHy and why, why? I got this....
"Lord, what is your next plan for me?"

I can feel that my future will not such as my brother n sister who came back to my family after their education jounery and having their own family and life.

I still have lot of things to achieve on~~
I want to go the place that I haven't reach on. I want to do the things that won't regret me later on~~
" Lord, can I Do this alone?"

For this year I start to not listen my family words I start do my own decisions.
Lets I deal everything by my self or later on I will regret for the rest of my life.

I found myself in trouble when I fall in love with someone.
Sometimes I really don't understand myself.. What I try to do... I made my days very stupid... Should I carry on~~ why oh why?

I haven't do my own vision for this year... the butterfly keep on playing in my mind but I didn't catch her....
I will catch her today if there is no barrier...

This morning I send a Verse to someone. I hope he know I like him very much.... I can felt I got chemistry with him... I never met a person like him who share his life story for me.
I really want to help him.. to love him even though I know that I'm going to foolishing myself.. I know there is no ending story between us because I dont want againts the law of God.

I just surrender everything to God. I will keep myself NO SEX before Marriage. Lets the time answer it.
"Lord, I want to be with him at two times only.... NOW and FOREVER.In your name I pray. Amen."